Minnesota Low Conflict Inexpensive Divorce Ideas
It’s time to rethink how we approach divorce. The days of conflict and court cases are over. That is a waste of time and money. If it is at all possible, it is very good for your finances, peace of mind and your children to have an amicable divorce process. Here are a few ways that you can ensure you have a cost-effective divorce that still gets you a fair outcome.
There are a lot of different terms that are used in place of “low-conflict divorce” I will explain what each of them mean:
Collaborative Divorce
Collaborative divorce is the approach that the family law courts are going to assume you take. It really just refers to the idea that your lawyers collaborate to come to an agreement. They draft a divorce decree and the only role the court plays is approving it. So while the term “collaborative divorce” does refer to a low-conflict approach to solving the problems, it’s the approach that the family law court sees as the default.
Traditional Divorce – Divorce Litigation
It’s odd that this is referred to as “traditional divorce” because it’s not traditional. It’s unnecessarily confrontational. It takes time, money and emotional resources that are already going to be in limited supply. When your divorce goes to court, that means a judge is going to make final and binding decisions about your divorce. A judge will decide your custody arrangement as well as your financial arrangements. Even though “working it out” with your soon to be ex-spouse may seem difficult or even impossible, it will typically yield a better (and more affordable) overall result than litigation or taking your divorce to the family law courts.
Mediation – (sometimes called Alternative Dispute Resolution or ADR)
Mediation is an approach to divorce that can save a lot of money on lawyer fees. The approach with mediation is that BOTH spouses hire ONE attorney. Through some conversations and planning they talk about what they want and the mediation attorney helps guide the process so that you end with a divorce agreement that will be accepted by the courts. The mediation attorney DOES NOT make decisions for you. So you will need to have a general framework and agreement of how you will handle such major decisions as:
What you will do with the shared house (the attorney can help you understand HOW it will affect the divorce, they can NOT help decide what to do with the house)
- How to create a custody plan that is in the best interest of the children
- How to manage big dates like holidays, birthdays, summer vacation and more
- How to make a financial plan that will be accepted by the courts
- How to create a child support arrangement that is fair to both parties and ensures that the kids have what they need
Hiring a Tough Lawyer
There is always a lot of emotion involved in a divorce, and sometimes people make an emotionally charged decision about what type of divorce lawyer they should hire. The thing that you need to understand is that no matter how you feel about your spouse, these two facts will NOT change:
- Having a Lawyer Do anything for you is expensive
- There is range of what the courts will accept as fair
The point is, there isn’t a lawyer you can hire who is going to make it so you do not have to pay spousal support if your spouse has no income. You are not going to hire a “tough aggressive lawyer” and then keep your spouse from seeing the kids. Unless you are married to someone who has disappeared, is in prison or has a lengthy documented record of physical abuse and or chemical addiction, you are probably going to have to give them a fair shot at seeing the kids and having an income.
